Monday, September 1, 2008

Emergency Poontang Rescue Button

Contrary to what you might think...

Liveblogging a death-threatening storm is NOT a way to meet pretty bisexual girls that will come kidnap your sexy ass. Otherwise Geraldo would be bonking a Bourbon Street stripper at this very moment rather than torturing SheepDogs with questions that a grade school newspaper intern would not voluntarily acknowledge as his own creation.

Kimberly and I are previously umm, uh, well-acquainted, and she is certainly qualified to comment on my ass.

In the interests of fair play, I must disclose that women are about evenly divided as to whether or not I am more accurately described omitting the word "cute."

It is nice to know, however, that in my perilous situation this "looky-loo" (hat tip - Fox News) has an Emergency Poontang Button to press if things down here get too gnarly to save his ass, be it cute or no.

Smite me, Gustav!

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